SUKUNA MEDICAL ACADEMY 🩺

🚨 ADMISSIONS OPEN 🚨 Only 3 seats left (there were 3 seats to begin with) • 🩺 Now teaching the Krebs cycle in under 4 hours • 💀 Free skeleton keychain with every enrolment • ☕ Tea provided. Biscuits not guaranteed. •

🧠 Why Learn From Mirshan? 🧠

🦴 Knows all 206 bones by name. Has given at least 40 of them nicknames.

📕 Has officially retired Robbins Pathologic Basis of Disease. Students now study from Mirshan's Pathologic Basis of Disease. Robbins has not been informed.

🤓 Knows the answer to literally everything. Ask him how he knows and he'll say "it's common knowledge". It is not common knowledge. Nobody else knows it.

📚 Has read Guyton & Hall cover to cover. Twice. Once was by accident while looking for the index.

🫀 Can explain the cardiac cycle using only hand gestures and the word "whoosh".

🧪 His mnemonics are so unhinged you will never forget them. You will also never be able to say them in an exam hall.

⏰ Available 24/7. Mostly because he hasn't slept since first year.

📋 Courses Offered 📋

all courses come with a free existential crisis

🧬

Premed Bootcamp

Biology, chemistry, physics, and the art of telling relatives "yes, I'm still studying".

A/L & premed

💀

Anatomy (Unplugged)

Featuring Gerald, our skeleton. Gerald is missing a femur. We don't talk about it.

1st year MBBS

⚗️

Biochem Survival

Krebs cycle, glycolysis, and a guided group cry. Tissues included in course fee.

all years

💊

Pharmacology Speedrun

Learn 300 drug names that all sound like Pokémon. Gotta prescribe 'em all.

2nd–3rd year

🫁

Physiology but Make It Make Sense

Why do lungs? How does kidney? Questions finally answered.

all years

✍️

Doctor Handwriting Masterclass

Advanced module. By graduation, not even you will be able to read your notes.

final year

📕 Required Textbook 📕

ROBBINS

MIRSHAN'S

Pathologic Basis
of Disease

1st Edition · 1 Author · 0 Peer Reviewers

📖 Every chapter ends with "trust me bro"
🔬 Chapter 4 (Inflammation) is just Sir describing his reaction to bad answers
🧾 Sources cited: common knowledge
❌ Robbins is not accepted in class. Robbins has been banned from the building.

🤓 Ask Sir Anything 🤓

he knows. he always knows. don't ask how.

Press the button to ask Sir a question

🗓️ Weekly Timetable 🗓️

Day	Class
Monday	Anatomy with Gerald 💀
Tuesday	Biochem + emotional support session
Wednesday	Physiology (bring a balloon, you'll see)
Thursday	Pharmacology Pokédex revision
Friday	Past papers & screaming into a pillow
Saturday	Mock viva (Sir will stare at you in silence)
Sunday	Sir is asleep. Do not call Sir.

💸 Fees 💸

Intern

1 KOTTU

✅ Weekly classes
✅ Access to Sir's notes
❌ Ability to read Sir's notes

Resident

2 KOTTU + COKE

✅ Everything in Intern
✅ Unlimited mnemonics
✅ Sir replies to WhatsApp (eventually)

Consultant

YOUR SOUL

✅ Everything in Resident
✅ 1-on-1 viva practice
✅ Sir attends your graduation and cries

📈 Our Results 📈

100%

of students passed (the canteen, on the way in)

lawsuits (so far)

all-nighters pulled by Sir this month

∞

cups of tea consumed

⭐ What Students Say ⭐

★★★★★

"Before Mirshan sir, I thought the pancreas was a type of pasta. Now I know it's a type of organ. Life changing."

— Kavindi, 1st year MBBS

★★★★★

"He taught us the brachial plexus with a song. I hum it in the shower now. Please help."

— Rizwan, premed

★★★★☆

"Lost one star because Gerald the skeleton fell on me during class. Otherwise excellent."

— Anonymous, now with a mild concussion

★★★★★

"My mother finally calls me 'doctor' at family functions. I am in 2nd year. Thank you sir."

— Nethmi, 2nd year MBBS

❓ FAQ ❓

Is Mirshan an actual doctor?

Next question.

Can I bring my own skeleton?

Yes, as long as it's still inside you.

What if I fail?

Sir will personally write you a sick note. You won't be able to read it, but it will be very official.

How does Sir know all of this?

Common knowledge.

Is Mirshan's Pathologic Basis of Disease available in bookshops?

No. It exists only in Sir's head and is released one chapter at a time, verbally, usually at 11pm.

Are classes online or physical?

Both. Sir is physically there, mentally online (checking cricket scores).

Why is it called "Sukuna" Medical Academy?

Because after one lecture, your brain will have been cursed with knowledge. Also because that's his name. Mostly the second one.

🩸 DOMAIN EXPANSION: MALEVOLENT LECTURE HALL 🩸

Once activated, all students within a 200m radius are guaranteed to learn the entire nephron. There is no escape. The doors are locked. There is a pop quiz.